Somebody tell me where he is!
Aggie!
Aggie, where's Cooper?
Aggie, tell me where he is!
Where is he?
Aggie?!
No, no, no, no, no!
Hey! Good morning, Steve.
Hi!
Hey, hey, hey! It's okay. It's okay.
Oyster Bay Cove Police Department.
Hi, this is Aggie Wiggs at 225 Aspen Drive.
There are two very large, very scary dogs outside my house,
clawing at my windows and barking like crazy.
-We can get someone right over. -Uh…
-Yeah, would you? -Yes, ma'am.
Stop!
Good morning.
Are you Mrs. Wiggs?
Y… Yes.
Oh, apologies about the dogs.
Okay.
If they should come over here again, you give us a call. We're just next door.
You have a nice day, Mrs. Wiggs.
Those things will kill you.
Jesus, Stan. I don't appreciate being snuck up on or lectured to.
You're jumpy this morning, aren't you?
-What's up with the new neighbor? -You didn't hear?
It's Nile Jarvis.
You're kidding.
Yeah. I guess we better start locking our doors.
You'd think he'd wanna be a little more discreet.
Yeah, he put a notice in everyone's mailbox about a week ago.
He wants to build a, uh, jogging path through the woods for all of us to enjoy.
He can't do that. It's community property.
He's asking for an easement.
Rick and… and Lena seem to think it's a good idea.
I doubt the Bakers will object. Do you wanna be the one to tell him no?
What's he gonna do? Murder me?
When's the next book coming out, huh? Linda and I can't wait.
You'll be the first to know, Stan.
"Dear neighbor, my name is Nile Jarvis,
and I've just moved into number 39."
"We have many acres of beautiful woods running behind our homes,
which are totally underutilized."
"As a gesture of goodwill, I've hired a construction company
to create a private jogging path… …through the woods for all to enjoy."
My God.
Jesus.
Hey.
Hi, Pippa.
Hey, it's Shelley. Leave a message.
Hey. Uh, it's me.
Again.
Um…
I don't… I don't know if you're busy or ignoring me or what, but, um,
we haven't talked about tomorrow, so, um…
Uh, I think I'm gonna go visit Cooper around noon, maybe?
Um…
I figured I'd let you know in case you wanted to be there together,
or not be there together.
Um…
You know, it'd be great to see you, but, uh,
whatever works is… is fine.
Um…
Yeah, so, um, I hope you're well.
Okay. Bye.
Unbelievable.
Jesus.
Stop! Stop!
Get in the car!
Shit.
Hey!
Oh, goddammit!
Fuck this. This is…
Fuck.
Hello.
-Uh, hi. -I was just putting the dogs away.
Oh, it's fine, Rick. We're good.
I said I'm fine.
Uh, I'm Aggie. Uh, Wiggs.
I, uh, live next door.
Of course! It's so great to meet you.
You know, the broker mentioned that you live nearby.
I hope that's not a gross violation of privacy.
But we're such huge fans of your work.
I'm Nina Jarvis.
Hi.
Uh, this was dropped at my house. I assume because of the dogs?
-I am so sorry about those dogs. -And I, uh…
Yeah, I… I don't really drink, so…
Maybe you could bring it to a dinner party.
I don't do that either.
Right. Um… Well, here, come inside. I can get you something.
-No, I really-- -No, I insist. Come in.
Please.
I'm so sorry about all of this.
Excuse the mess. We're still getting situated.
You know, I have to confess.
Um, in my head, I thought you were gonna be older.
I… I guess I've been reading your profiles for decades.
-Well-- -Agatha Wiggs.
Honey, we really gotta get these dogs under control.
Did you get my letter?
Um, I did, yes.
Why don't you come into my office? We can chat.
Well, there's not much to chat about, really.
I'm afraid my answer is no.
Come on up. Give me…
Give me five minutes.
Um, actually, I was on my way out, but it was so great to meet you.
Maybe we could have lunch sometime?
Soon?
When did this happen?
How the fuck should I know? You figure it out.
What?
Look, I'm gonna call you back. I've got someone here.
Benitez is toothless. She fucking knows it.
We give an inch, they'll smell blood in the water.
No, it's okay. I'll take care of it. Yeah.
Okay.
Well, tell Gold to stop wetting himself. Christ.
No. No, I said I'll take care of it.
The incompetence of 99% of the population.
Jarvis Yards. Largest mixed-use venture in American history.
One year out of completion, and a bunch of socialist NIMBY fucks
think they can reopen the zoning.
Sit, please.
Uh, no. That's… that's all right.
Beet juice?
Uh, no, thanks.
Lowers cholesterol, raises brain function.
Tastes like shit.
Uh, I… I really can't stay.
I… I just came to return the wine
and ask that you and your wife please do something about the dogs.
They've… they've gotten out twice now, and they're very,
uh, distracting.
Anything else you wanna
put in the suggestion box there, neighbor?
Uh, well, actually, yeah.
Um, your alarm, uh, as a matter of fact, was, uh, pretty… intrusive.
Yeah. Yeah, my security team, they're still working out the glitches.
Well, the sound carries quite a bit. Uh…
You know, sometimes I write at night.
You're not how I pictured you.
At all. On the page, you're, um…
You're a lot more self-assured.
I, um…
I read it when it first came out. It was sensational.
What was this, 2000…
Oh, 2018.
That's a long time with no follow-up. Something new in the works?
Look, Mr. Jarvis--
Nile, please.
Look, frankly, it must be hell.
Sitting at home all day in your little
mind palace.
My hat's off to you.
I gotta be out in the world, otherwise I wither. Do you take walks?
-I'm sorry? -Get the blood moving.
All that stuck chi.
Nice little jogging path might be good for you.
Not to mention, it'll raise property values.
All… all your neighbors seem to think so.
In fact, you're the only one who hasn't signed off.
Well, I…
Maybe I prefer the woods
unpaved.
Huh.
I see. Wow. You, um…
What?
You want a payout.
Excuse me?
It's not enough I'm covering all the costs.
You want me to write you a check too?
What? No. I… I don't want your money. Jesus.
I admit it. I'll admit it.
I did not see this coming.
National treasure, Agatha Wiggs…
What's the expression? Don't meet your heroes?
Well, I guess we all have bills to pay.
Yeah, all due respect, you don't know anything about me.
Well, I know print media isn't booming,
and you haven't published anything since your little boy died.
-That can't be easy. -Don't mention my son.
My answer is no.
And keep the dogs away from my fucking house.
What the hell?
Hey! You can't be here.
No, no. No, not today.
We're just laying flowers. We don't want any trouble.
-You're not allowed near him. 500 feet. -You didn't think I might be here? Today?
-Teddy, come on. -Paying our respects.
-Bullshit. -Let's go now.
We don't want your flowers.
-Hey! Don't you touch him! -Aggie!
-It should be you in the ground.
-Aggie, stop! -I'll report you. I'm calling the police!
-No, Mrs. Fenig. That's not necessary. -Yes!
-Call them! Call the police! -Two strikes!
-Let's take a breath. -No!
Aggie, they're leaving, okay? You need to stop! Stop.
I'm sorry.
She's emotional today.
You can understand that. Right?
Can we please just drop it?
Please.
Let's go. Come on now.
I'm the asshole?
He killed our son
and then lied!
He won't take any responsibility whatsoever, and I…
-It was an accident. -No! He was drunk.
-We don't know that. -Bullshit, Shelley!
Yeah.
I'm not doing this.
I'm so sorry we're still fighting.
Shel.
Shel, I'm sorry.
Just…
Seeing him here like that today, I…
Can you please just
look at me?
I don't wanna have a whole discussion.
But you need help, Aggie.
I know that none of this is right or fair,
but it's been four years, and this rage--
I know. I know. I'm… I'm working on it. I am.
Sometimes bad things just happen.
How's Meg?
We're taking a break, actually.
Oh, I'm sorry.
Yeah.
And you? How…
How are you doing? I've barely heard from you.
Actually, I've…
I've been painting again, which feels…
Yeah, wow. That's…
That's great.
It feels like something is, like, opening up.
Maybe. I don't know. It's hard to explain.
Hey, I'd… I'd love to see what you're working on sometime, if that's…
Yeah, I'll let you know.
Oh fuck!
Ugh!
Jesus Christ!
I'll get you three chapters as soon as I can. I'm really sorry I haven't sent--
What? No! Honey, I wasn't…
I was just calling to check in as a friend.
I didn't expect you'd be writing today.
Sorry. Yeah.
So how are you holding up on this shittiest of all shitty days?
Teddy Fenig was at the grave site with his mother.
So that was fun.
Are you serious? Doing what?
Paying their respects. Trolling me.
That is repulsive.
Yeah, and my kitchen sink just started spitting up this brown, disgusting crap.
My house smells like a fucking sewage plant.
It's gonna cost God knows how much to fix it.
Oh, honey.
Which is actually…
Look, um, I've been meaning to ask,
and I really hate to do this, but
is there any chance I could get another advance? I'm…
I'm just drowning a little.
Oh, kiddo, you know, I… I can try,
but Bob is really not gonna go for that again.
I mean, we're two years behind
on delivery.
-I've been running interference. -No. I know. I know.
I was counting on that money to do the renovations,
and then… and then things just…
Maybe if you had a few chapters you could show him? Something?
Right.
Yeah.
I mean, is it just the repairs, or are you behind on the mortgage?
Because if you are finally ready to sell, I have a great broker.
No, no, no. I'll, uh… I'll figure something out.
I'm fine.
-Are you sure? -Yeah.
Yeah, yeah. Uh, it's just,
you know, been a day.
Yeah.
Um…
You'll never believe who moved in next door.
Um, okay, like someone I know, or a celebrity?
You know me. If it's pop culture,
I'm hopeless.
Nile Jarvis.
Stop it.
Nile Jarvis?
Yep.
Good God. Have you actually seen him?
Oh, we had a full introduction.
Yeah, he is a real piece of work.
You better stay on his good side.
I think that ship has sailed.
Hey, what do you mean?
He's trying to take over the whole block. I just gave him some honest feedback.
Jesus. Be careful, okay?
They don't know he killed the wife, do they?
I mean, they… they never found the body.
Yeah, which is fishy, though, right?
This is why you don't live in the country. I'd never sleep.
Well, listen, um…
I… I really should actually get some rest.
Um, but thanks for calling.
And I'll get pages to you as soon as I can.
Of course. You take an edible and get some sleep.
I love you, kiddo.
Love you.
My best guess is there's roots gotten into the pipes under your house.
They get old, they get cracks.
The longer you wait, the more you're really just asking for it.
For us to be certain, I gotta get a camera in there.
Uh, sorry. One sec.
Sh. Hey.
Afternoon.
Hey. Steve, cut it out. Cut it out.
Listen, um…
I have a small favor to ask.
I was wondering if you would sign my copy.
I… I meant what I said. It's really something. I don't blow smoke.
And I would have asked yesterday, but, um…
Yeah.
Could've sworn I brought a pen.
Maybe I could borrow one of yours?
I'm sure you got a couple lying around here.
Um…
Wait here.
Thank you.
I'm indebted.
You're welcome.
Let me take you to lunch. We got off on the wrong foot.
Least I can do.
Oh, I… I appreciate that, but I'm… I'm working.
It's a perfect day. Look at this.
It'd be a crime to stay cooped up inside.
Uh, another time, maybe.
There are people who've paid good money for an invitation like this.
No joke. Ten years ago, I was auctioned off for a charity.
Lunch with Nile Jarvis, one-on-one.
Well, if there's a way I can donate it to a worthy cause.
Oh, you are so cruel. Do you know that?
You get off on being cruel, don't you?
Suppose you need a cup of sugar. You can't exactly avoid me.
Hey, I'm gonna go ahead and take apart the sink first.
If I were you, I might open up a couple of windows.
One hour tops. Give the place a chance to… air out.
I'll give you a lift.
Um…
How about I meet you there? I… I need to change.
Eleanor's?
Sure.
Don't keep me waiting.
Someone's knocking at the door
Somebody's ringing the bell
Do me a favor
Open the door
And let 'em in
-Right this way, ma'am. -Hi. Thank you.
-Hi. -Hi.
I like this view.
My, uh… My father used to bring us here when we were kids.
Birthdays and graduations.
It's changed owners over the years. It's not what it used to be.
But, um, what can I say?
Yeah, I'm nostalgic.
-Specials are on the back. -Thank you.
Can I get you something to drink?
Um, a Diet Coke, please.
You grew up here?
Yeah. Prodigal son returns.
Tired of Manhattan?
I was tired of the looky-loos and the rumor mill.
-The world thinks they know what happened. -To Madison, you mean?
Mm-hmm.
What about you?
-Lived here a while? -Yeah, we, um…
We bought the house five years ago, my wife and I. My ex-wife.
We'd been living in Fort Greene. Our son was growing fast, so we wanted more space.
Or I did, anyway.
Shelley, my ex, um…
…thought it was absurd buying such a big house that needed all that work.
Had to do something with all that Pulitzer money, right?
Yeah, I'm…
The prize itself isn't much, but, um…
-But, yeah, it did well. -I remember.
The book was everywhere.
Did you, uh,
send your father a cut?
-Of the royalties? -Yeah. I don't know. Maybe I should have.
We don't speak.
Is that right?
The sacrifices we make for greatness.
I suppose.
Well, it's a shame though. It sounds like he misread it.
I mean, yes, you aired some dirty laundry, but you clearly worshipped the man.
As a child.
Oh, bullshit.
And now.
He made you what you are. He was ruthless. He was creative.
Uh, he's a con man. And a fraud.
But he made people believe.
Most sociopaths do.
You say what you want. You ask me, that book is a love letter.
So what are you writing now? Another memoir?
Uh, no. God, no.
A novel?
No, it's, um…
It's more biography.
Oh yeah? About who?
Oh, it's top secret?
Ruth Bader Ginsburg. And her friendship with Antonin Scalia.
-The Supreme Court-- -Yes, I…
Oh my God. Yeah, I know who they are. Christ, what do you take me for?
Well, you were looking at me like that--
Well, yeah, because it's boring. No wonder you're stuck.
It's not boring.
It's a little boring.
It's two people with radically opposed worldviews,
deeply polarized convictions, who still managed to have real affection--
It's a snooze.
Yeah, well, I think it's a story that could offer hope.
No one wants hope. You know that.
People want gossip and carnage.
You want another bestseller, you should write about me.
Okay.
Why… Why is that funny?
Uh…
I'm pretty fucking interesting.
And I got stories, believe me. People think they know. They don't.
-Had a chance to look at the menu? -Uh…
No, sorry. I think--
I'll do the branzino. She'll have the chicken pomodoro.
It's what they're known for. You'll love it.
Now suppose I'm a vegan.
Not a chance.
You got too much bloodlust. I can smell it.
Oh, what? Am I wrong? Tell me I'm wrong.
I'm not saying you're wrong. I'm saying you're--
That I'm what? Come on, Miss Pulitzer, use your words.
Kind of an asshole.
I should hang out with more dykes.
Oh! Wow! Okay.
I mean, you're really not afraid of me.
-Should I be? -It depends what you've read.
Most people are just walking on eggshells and kissing my ass,
telling me what I wanna hear.
Oh.
That must be hard.
You see? Funny.
Wait, is that… Is that why I'm here?
To… entertain you?
Well, not just that. Also because I don't take no for an answer, so
how much do you want?
Come on, let's just cut to the chase.
For my jogging path. I'll write you a check right now.
Look, I told you. I'm not asking for--
Oh, I don't care that you're asking. Everyone has a price. Everyone.
I'm sorry.
Oh, come on. Seriously? Are you gonna make me beg?
-I don't know what to tell you. -And who the fuck names their dog Steve?
What is that?
-What? -"My dog Steve"?
What are you trying to prove?
"Hello, this is my dog Joe and my dog Rachel." It's ridiculous.
My son named him.
Yeah, we got the, um…
We got the puppy when Cooper was four,
and he said,
"I think his name is Steve."
And I said, "Really? Why?"
And he said,
"I just think it's a good name for a dog."
Well, shit. I
can't get my foot out of my mouth, can I?
Apparently not.
It was a car accident, huh?
Drunk driver?
Fucker refused a breathalyzer at the scene.
By the time they did a blood test, he was barely under the limit.
Supposedly.
He still works over at Roberto's.
And no jail time? Nothing?
Nope. They ruled it an accident.
They said it was my fault. That I was…
I was driving erratically. He lied through his teeth.
He had the nerve to slap me with a restraining order.
I had a rough few years.
I, uh, made some poor choices.
Because…
All I wanted was for him to suffer like I did, and… and he just never…
It's like I said.
Bloodlust.
Don't turn around.
Excuse me a second.
-Hi there. -Hi.
Listen, um…
I couldn't help but notice that you took our picture.
-What? -I'm gonna ask you to delete the photo.
-What are you talking about? -Delete it. No hard feelings.
We're on vacation, and I was taking a picture of my daughter.
Oh, you think I'm an idiot?
Mom. Maybe just--
You know, the funny thing is, is if you'd asked,
if you'd been upfront about it, I might have taken a selfie with you,
but it's the sneaking around that I don't appreciate.
I really don't.
Sir, this is a public establishment. I'm not breaking any laws.
Really?
Hey! What the hell?! Are you insane?
-That's my property! -Hey, hey, hey, hey! Ma'am…
-I'm gonna file a police report. -That's not necessary.
We're on vacation!
Just calm down. We're gonna make this up to you.
Chicken pomodoro.
And the branzino.
Can I get you anything else?
No, I think we're perfect.
They're good leftovers.
Yeah, Steve will love it.
-Where'd you park? -Uh, just across the street.
I'll walk you. You do realize I'm not giving up on this.
Go home, have a think, give me a number, and I'll make it worth your while.
Just… just don't tell your neighbors. This is strictly non-precedential.
Honestly, I would have thought you had bigger fish to fry.
Oh, I fry 'em all, babe. That's the secret.
That's him, huh?
That's Teddy Fenig.
Christ, you must have to see that son of a bitch all the time.
Only if I leave my house.
Yeah. It's a small town.
All I can do is look away when I run into him buying his six-packs
and his gummy bears.
It's not right.
Um…
Well, thanks.
Thanks for lunch, Mr. Jarvis.
Nile, please. Come on. We're friends now, right?
How lucky we got with the weather.
Ma'am, no, no! Wait, wait! It's okay. See?
FBI.
I'm worried for your safety.
I just wanna talk to you. That's all.
About your neighbor.
Please.
Ma'am.
Come on.
Yeah. Yeah.
-Can I come in? -No. You cannot. What the hell is this?
That's fair. That's very fair.
I'm sorry, I couldn't use the front. Someone might have seen. I'm
Special Agent Brian Abbott with the FBI.
Can you
put that down?
What are you doing here?
Nile Jarvis.
You two, you had lunch today.
I know,
uh, this is a little irregular, but you're in this house alone.
And now he's here, and you're talking to him. You're laughing with him.
-You're doing God knows what with him-- -What?
I just wouldn't be able to live with myself,
you know, my conscience, if I didn't…
say, "Be careful."
He's not like us, you know?
Sorry, does…
does this mean you're still investigating him?
No, I… I didn't say that.
What, for Madison? Or… or something else?
-I… I thought it was a closed case. -I can't get into any of that.
But you can come banging on my door
in the pouring rain in the middle of the night, drunk?
Uh…
What, you scared the shit out of me!
You're right. You're…
you're right. I'm drunk.
This is probably a mistake.
Keep your distance, all right?
Please, keep your distance.
From one concerned citizen to another. That's all.
What did you say your name was?
Brian Abbott.
Take care.
Jesus, there you are.
Hey. Is everything okay?
Has anyone called you?
-What? -Has anyone called?
You mean other than you? Um…
I don't know. I just woke up. I was, uh… I was up late.
Oh God, okay. Um…
What? What's going on?
Look, Aggie, everything's fine, but--
But what? You're… you're scaring me.
Teddy Fenig.
It looks like he killed himself last night.
What?
I know. It's…
I don't know what to say.
Wait, what?
How?
I don't know. It's on the local news.
I… I guess they found his car by the beach.
They think he drowned himself.
Oh my God.
Look, he obviously had his own demons, okay?
You can't blame yourself.
Aggie, are you there?
Yeah. Uh…
I… I gotta go.
Wait! Agg--
No.
Christ, you must have to see that son of a bitch all the time.
It's not right.
All I wanted was for him to suffer like I did.
See?
Like I said.
Bloodlust.
What did you do?
Someone knocking at the door
Somebody ringing the bell
Someone's knocking at the door
Somebody's ringing the bell
Do me a favor
Open the door
And let 'em in
Ooh, yeah
Someone's knocking at the door
Somebody's ringing the bell
Someone's knocking at the door
Somebody's ringing the bell
Do me a favor
Open the door
And let 'em in
Yeah, let 'em in
Sister Suzie
Brother John
Martin Luther
Phil and Don
Brother Michael
Auntie Gin
Open the door
And let 'em in
Ooh, yeah